It’s not who you know, it’s who they know!
- Written by Neil Patel on November 11th, 2007 |
- 17 Comments »
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Networking isn’t all about getting to know people who can just provide direct value. In many cases, the people you network with will not provide any direct benefit because they aren’t famous, don’t have much money, or don’t have a great job. However, this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t network with these people. Instead, get know them on a personal rather than professional level.
Although someone may not be able to provide any direct value to you, it doesn’t mean that his or her network can’t provide any value to you. In many cases they may know rich people or individuals in high places that can provide tons of benefit to you. The only way you will be able to gain any of those benefits is to get to know these people quite well and make sure they like you.
If you’re having trouble with this and don’t want to spend your entire day making friends with everybody, just pay attention to some initial cues. For example, people who name drop a lot usually don’t know many people on a personal level while those who don’t name drop are a better bet. Just pay attention to things that indicate the person is a pretty cool cat and might actually attract a lot of quality friends. This may be a bit hard to do, but you are going to have to keep your eyes and ears open if you really want to find those extremely valuable contacts.
Wise words. While it takes time to get to know where people are coming from, you can usually decrease the degrees of separation by paying attention to clues like the one you mentioned.
Sometimes the least likely person in the room has the next connection you’re seeking.
Great networking with you this weekend Neil . . . . hope we can meet up in LA some time for lunch!
Great meeting you as well. Hit me up whenever you want to meet up.
If you think of LinkedIn, there are 3 degrees of separation. This means that you have to think in terms of your network, their network and so forth.
I like the LinkedIn analogy, but I just hate LinkedIn overall. It can be very useful to some people, but it seems like there are too many false connections on there.
I agree Neil - the problem with LinkedIn et al is that many people focus on building a big network, rather than developing strong mutually beneficial links. Bigger is not always better!
Phil
Who knows what about who has often been called gossip…. lol. One thing I do is to keep a file on people I meet. Nothing fancy…just info like wife and kids names, birthdays, special interests, something that stands out from last conversation. It’s good info and by having a way to look this info up can be a great advantage when you next meet that person or email them. Something as simple as including a “happy birthday” at the end of an email will make you stand out…….
eric d aka noviceseo
Nice touch! I have found it when discussing family with others it is easier to make a connection compared to just discussing business.
So true! Sometimes even the most unlikely individuals have the biggest and most powerful social circles.
Additionally, it is who knows you well. Most people are too busy or deem it too risky to connect you to anyone they know if they don’t know that you’re a “solid citizen” who will not take away from the great relationship and reputation that they have with their connection.
If you are a “proven product” in their mind, then they’re more likely to introduce you to those in their contact spheres and then those in their spheres of influence.
I’m delighted everyday to where some of the best connections come from - even those great decision makers have friends they run around with, see at their kid’s schools, or soccer games or church.
This usually is true as long as you give people the time of day. There are some famous people I know who are well known, but they are arrogant and never take the time to get know people, which is why they aren’t well branded or don’t make much money.
Nice post Neil and so true. I can’t even think of all the people I had to shmooz until I finally met you.
It was so worth it!
Don’t you mean, you couldn’t remember all the people I had to shmooz to meet you?
your spot on with this post. it is definately more about connecting people and helping each other out.
I spend a lot of time during the week meeting with people. Mostly for non-business reasons. I subscribe to the mantra of “never eat alone.” I take people to lunch almost everyday because its a great networking tool. Often I will drive to them because I value connecting with people so much. It has been the key to every success or opportunity I have had in life.
I think it is also very true about name dropping too. Most people I know who know key people don’t do it. It is a trust thing with key relationships.
Mike.
http://www.DeadlyViper.org
I agree that, “Networking isn’t all about getting to know people who can just provide direct value.” Most of the people you already know (and their close friends) share the world you live in. They can’t supply anything new because they occupy the same space and know the same things you do. It’s the most tenuous connections (i.e. my colleague’s brother’s barber’s aunt) that offer the most valuable new opportunities. Because the worlds we inhabit are so different.
For example, if all you know is web design, you probably have a lot of techie friends. Say one of your buddy’s friends, Bob, is a realtor. If you network with the goal of developing a personal connection with everyone, you might have learned that Bob’s circle of friends includes every local realtor within 1,000 miles. And all of his realtor friends wish they had a nice clean website to put on their business card.
That business opportunity wouldn’t have come up if all you aimed for was direct value when meeting Bob. Instead you connected with him and he shared his contacts with you.
Without meeting people outside our normal circles, it’s easy to not see what opportunities we’re missing.
- Pete Kistler
Director, Brand-Yourself.com
Brand-Yourself.com Blog
Be the one to be known. The one who even when you are boring, people think its their fault.
If you go around analysing peoples worth you’ll get spotted and avoided very quickly.
There is an art- no a gift in being no kicking and screamingly interesting and its being interested and being seen to be interested and importantly getting joy from everything and everyday. THEN, everyone wants a part of YOU. The Baldchemist